Category: parenting

Love & Religion

If one day, you fall in love with someone who is has a different religion, would it matter to us? The answer is no. It does not matter.

Mummy is from a family of Christians. Although I am a backslider, i still believe in Jesus. Daddy is a free thinker but he sways towards Taoism. That however, did not deter us from being together. I have always believed that God is actually that 1 same God, depicted into many different versions by men. Regardless of who God really is, I also believe that he/she would want us to love everyone. In the New Testament of the bible, it is stated ‘Love One Another, As I Have Loved You’. Religion can bring people to celebrate God – but it can also destroy love (unfortunately for some). But please do not let that happen to you. I strongly believe that if you love one another enough, religion and love can coexist.

Out of respect for each other, we do not have any altars at home. If daddy wants to go to the temple, I do not stop him. I am also sure he will not stop me from going to church. Hence, you will get to pick your own religion when you are older. And when you meet the right one, know that religion should not come between you both.

Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. It is not rude, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres. Love never fails.
1 Corinthians 13:4-8a (New International Version)

Love boldly my son. ❤

Count Your Blessings

You may not know this yet, but you are extremely fortunate. You have enough to eat, a cosy home to live in and most importantly, you are loved by so many people.

If I was asked to name a kid I personally know of who has many toys, your name will definitely be the first to pop up in my mind.

playroomNot all your toys are in the photo above, but as you ca see, you practically have your own indoor playground!

All you have to do, is ask for a particular toy and you usually get it. You know that Paw Patrol Lookout Tower in the photo above? Just so you know, it is not sold in Singapore. This Christmas, you also requested for a Paw Patroller, again, not sold in Singapore. A huge part of me feel that you were given so much probably because I did not have a lot of toys growing up. I remember envying kids who have new toys during Christmas. Believe it or not, I got to pick my own Christmas present when I was almost 10. I chose a board game called ‘The Game of Life’ and it was a shared gift between my sister and me. It is not a big deal that I got that little toys, what I am saying is, you are one lucky boy. In fact, you have too many toys that is why we stopped buying unless it is your birthday or Christmas. Mummy hope you will always remember to count your blessings in life.

 

The Rag-and-Bone Man

As we were heading to the car the other day, we ran into the rag-and-bone man just outside the carpark. As usual, just like how you’d say hi to the construction workers and any random passer by, you greeted the rag-and-bone man happily. In return, he said “hello boy” to you too.

Then you said a word which would have been extremely hurtful if he had heard it. Smelly. You said “smelly”. I immediately stopped you and you got a serious scolding in the car by your daddy and me for making such a remark.

Well son, you may be young and most people will forgive you simply because they will think you are just a kid. But why mummy and daddy were so angry that day was because of the fact that you were extremely rude and mean despite the fact that I believe it was never your intention.

Quite honestly though, I have no idea if you were referring to the rag-and-bone man, or the unwanted items in his lorry that was smelly. Everything just happened so quickly. But since there was really no smell from that vehicle and man, I thought it was a stereotype that the rag-and-bone man / his collections was/were smelly. I kept asking you who told you that they smell but you refused to answer.

When you grow up, I hope you learn the following :

1. The tongue is the sharpest weapon. Words may just be words, but they can really affect people. You will be amazed by how powerful words really are

2. Putting yourself in others’ shoes. How would you feel if someone told you, or someone you love that they are smelly?

It may be over now but I truly hope you learn and never forget this lesson.

Gramps Lim

If there is anyone in the world you should be eternally grateful for (besides your parents), it has got to be these 2 beautiful people.

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Grandpa and grandma Lim are your caregivers while dad and I are at work. Rain or shine, they’d pick you up from playgroup and bring you home for dinner. Although a couple of hours at their place everyday may not sound like much, but just think about the amount of effort taken to pick you up, cook for you, shower you, just to make sure that you do not go hungry. If only you are not picky about food and can eat more in school. There is no doubt how much they love you.

They loved you even before you were born. When we went to shop for your cot in preparation for your arrival, gramps Lim insisted on buying your little crib. In their words, “阿公阿嬷买给 baby 的”.

You were born a month early. Daddy and I didn’t have time to buy your daily necessities like diapers and shower stuffs. The moment they heard you were arriving, they bought everything for us just so we don’t have to worry about it.

When you were a few months old, you came down with stomach flu and ended up being hospitalised. Daddy and I stayed over with you just to make sure you knew we were by your side. When we got home after you were discharged, we came home to find the whole house cleaned, sheets changed, toys sanitized. That’s grandma Lim for you. She came by to clean so you wouldn’t fall sick again.

After you started school, someone passed the hfmd to you. There were so many blisters on your arms, legs and insides of your mouth and daddy and I decided to bring you over to gramps place the next morning before going to work. Without hesitation, they suggested that you stayed over at their place until you recovered and we can visit you everyday after work. They said this way, we will not disturb your sleep by carrying you out of bed in the morning to bring you to their place. At the same time, we can get enough rest for work as well. Looking after a kid is not an easy task. Looking after a sick kid who is not sleeping and feeding well is tough on a whole new level. They did not have to shoulder that responsibility, but they did.

When you were about to start potty training, your teacher wrote it in your communication book where parents and teachers update each other about the child’s performance in school. By the time I read her note stating that you were going to be off diapers the next day, and that we have to pack underwear for you, it was already late evening. While I was thinking if I should just inform the teachers the next day about delaying the potty training, grandma Lim showed up at our doorstep with 2 boxes of underwear. It was close to 9pm. It was totally unexpected and heartwarming.

I wish I could list down every single thing they have done for us, but I’m sure you will see it for yourself as you grow up.

I hope that you will learn to be grateful for every little thing that people do for you and love them back. Remember, learn to be grateful my little darling.

“My Jie Jie is an Angel”

This was what you said when I tucked you into bed last night. I was startled because I did not see that coming. As though I did not hear it, you repeated – “daddy said my jie jie is an angel”.

You are right, your jie jie is an angel. Although we have somewhat moved on from the loss of your big sister, nobody talks about it because it is just a very sensitive topic to us. I remember the shock, rage and I felt. I was overwhelmed with emotions and was so angry at God. I find myself questioning my faith and the things I believed in. I had a lot of ifs in my mind shortly after our loss. If she had been delivered based on EDD, her birthday would have been 19th July, which I have never forgotten. If she only knew how much we loved her. If only she knew mummy had secretly named her Emma.

And so they said, everything eventually comes to an end. Like there will be an end to the excitement you felt about a particular holiday or that happiness you felt when you were a kid with the latest toy etc. But the sadness I feel towards your big sister, there is no end. Even though I feel like I can talk about it now, I still feel sad when I think about it. Every single night for the past 4 years, I say a little prayer for her and ask her to watch over us in Heaven. I will ask God to look after her for us until we see her again. That being said, I don’t think I stopped believing in God. It’s just like we had a really really huge fight and are making up gradually.

Then you came along. I strongly believe that He gave you to us to make amends. You were an easy to handle baby and you have brought us so much joy since your arrival. Always bear in mind that mummy and daddy love you more than our own lives no matter what. The only wish we have for you is to grow up as a healthy, happy, respectful and kind person. Everything else is secondary. I’m sure jie jie will to watch over us from above.

Hello, my darling Isaac boy

Oh, my darling Isaac boy

Here we are, at the very first post in this space. Recently, I have been thinking about how quickly you are growing up and I really want to document the memories we have created and will be creating in time to come. I should have done this much earlier, but here I am, over 3 amazing years with you in our lives and finally started doing this. One day when you are older, you can take a trip down memory lane and read this for yourself.

Love, 

Mummy